App to help manage chronic pain

I have tried a few apps in the past few months to help manage my chronic pain. We all have different preferences, some people like writing whilst others would prefer more visual ways to record data.

This app (GeoPain) I have recently downloaded is my favourite so far. I am very forgetful and often find that in conversations, I can’t remember which days I had which symptoms, which isn’t good when you are talking to a doctor. This would be handy taking into the doctors room to help prompt you in conversation; sometimes we have so many side effects or triggers that we forget to list them all. I thought i’d share it as fellow chronic pain sufferers may find benefit in it. I havn’t been contacted to do a review or anything; I just wanted to.

There are so many apps out there, it can be handy to look at blog posts to see what the app is like before downloading as you can end up with about 20 different apps to try; which does take up storage on your device.

I like an easy to use app without having to do any typing; sometimes i’m too tired to write out my symptoms.

This app is very visual which I like. You have to set up an account and log in every time you want to use it which I think is good as if someone is on your phone; they can’t just access your data when they open the app.

You can choose to submit your data for research or you can keep it private. I chose to submit mine. You can also choose to set up notifications which I turned off.

Every day you can add multiple entries in and look at your history as well as reports.



When you add an entry, you can add impact, pain and treatment.

When I click on impact, it first asks how does this pain impact your daily activities.

The next screen asks what do you think triggers your pain. In the screenshot it just shows a few but you can scroll down and there’s loads more including heat, cold, touch, anxiety, stress etc.



I think this part is very handy as if it were writing an entry, I wouldn’t be thinking of triggers. The fact that you can look back on your entries is a good idea as you might even be able to see what possibly triggers your really bad days.

The next screen asks what symptoms you are experiencing. Again the screenshot shows just a few but you can scroll down and there’s loads more including dizziness, nausea, tinnitus, irritable, anxiety.



The next screen then asks you for a pain level writing and then you have the option to write any entries you want.

Once this has been done you go to pain and you can draw in the body where you are experiencing pain along with a colour scale of pain. You can rotate the body around so you can colour in the back and sides like inside of the leg. When you have done it once, you can import the data from the last save so that you don’t have to sit there and colour in again if you experience a lot of the same pain each day.


Once this has been done you then click on treatment which just records if and what treatment you have taken in the day such as bed rest, medication, massage, cannabis etc.


The app is called GeoPain and I downloaded it from the apple store for free.

It is also available on the play store.

They have a website called where you can find more information. This review was just my opinion on the app as a chronic pain sufferer.



CBD Oil helped me through my wedding

I wrote a post back in february this year about my experience with CBD oil.

I had not bought anymore as it is expensive stuff; I can get through a £60 bottle in 2 weeks. Since writing my first blog, circumstances have changed so I am writing up another review.

What has changed since February?

I had a job briefly from June to November but had to leave for many reasons, physical and mental health being two. I worked within retail on weekends, and done the odd shift in the week days as we are desperate for money. My partner took a pay cut this year for a more stable job so this year has been very testing for us financially too.

In November, my pain was getting worse. At the beginning of the year, I couldn’t have my cat put her two front paws on my right leg because of my CRPS, fibromyalgia etc; the weigh of  9 pound cat is extremely painful; i get shockwaves of pain and i feel so tender and bruised where she stands. Now, I cannot have my cat do this on either of my legs. My GP confirmed that my fibromyalgia has started to spread to my left hand side. It doesn’t matter what side someone hits into me now, i am so tender and hypersensitive on both sides.

From things going on both at work and just trying to deal with my health, my anxiety flared extremely bad where I couldn’t leave the house much in a month as I was so ridden with it I felt like i was going to throw up at the thought of going out.

I have also been diagnosed as of April this year with an underactive thryoid, so have gone on medication for that now in which I will need to be on forever.

What do I suffer from?

Complex regional pain syndrome; Fibromyalgia; M.E (Chronic fatigue syndrome), Anxiety, Depression, Hypothyroidism, and possible IBS.

The issues that affect me most are the nerve pain and the random limpness of the right arm and leg.

What medication am I currently on?

Citalopram 40mg for depression, zelleta 75mg for menstrual pain, levothyroxine 25mg for thyroid, and sometimes the odd tramadol some days 50mg a day sometimes up to 200mg

What medication have I tried?

For depression: Fluoxetine, Amitriptyline, Citalopram

For pain: Ibuprofen, Paracetemol, Naproxen, Tramadol, Co-codomol, Codeine, Amitriptyline to help with nerve pain and treat depression), Gabapentin, Ibuprofen gel, movelat gel.

How did I get this CBD oil?

My wedding day was on 3rd December 2018. In November I was complaining to my mum about how my pains were spreading and that the tramadol I have been prescribed was giving me so many nasty side effects. Out of her own money, my mum decided to buy me the same CBD oil as before as she remembered me saying that it worked quite well. She spent around £50 as she got money off due to black friday. She ordered it online and within 2-3 working days it arrived, we were very impressed with the speed of delivery considering she did not pay extra for quick delivery.

9D4743ED-1F8D-44FD-832D-2F7FBCDFA0A4My mum bought me ‘Love Hemp™ 800mg 8% CBD Oil – 10ml’  natural flavour from


The packaging the bottle comes in is handy, it keeps it secure so if it were to spill, it would stay in the packaging rather than spill in your bag. I have not had this problem at all. It is a nice handy size to carry around in your bag. The oil has to be kept out of sunlight so keeping this little tube is a must.

It suggests to use between 6 -12 drops taken 2-3x per day. Place the drops under the tongue and hold for 90 seconds before swallowing. There are 40 servings if the serving sizes are 6 drops at a time.

The ingredients contain hemp extract, raw organic hemp seed oil. natural flavouring.

It is vegan friendly, gluten free and co2 extracted. There is more information on the products on the website where you can contact them with any questions you may have.

Taste & smell

This time round I got the ‘natural’ flavour. It was vile yet again, it is not something I’d randomly take without reason. The pain has to be considerable for me to take this as it is so nasty but I think that is a good thing to be honest, it is not addictive in any way.

The taste dies down after a few minutes, minty chewing gum does help mask the flavour and the smell. It is not a pungent smell like if you were to smell someone on a train who had been smoking weed. It is only really noticeable when you put your nose to the bottle to smell it; and on your own breath you can smell it but its nothing like the nasty weed smell that gets in your clothes etc.


I started off taking 6 drops on the day after I received it and then a further 6 a few hours later. This was when my anxiety hit an all time high and I felt it did help calm me down alongside decreasing the nerve pain a bit.

I had been on tramadol daily for a month straight and was still feeling sick every time I ate. To go through this daily for a month was torture so I welcomed moving over to CBD oil again. After taking it, I did not feel sick, tired, no change at all, just a bit calmer.

I get the tramadol for free on the NHS due to me needing thryoid tablets for life but I hate all the side effects it gives me. The CBD oil gave me more relief on most days; and it didn’t leave me feeling any different after taking it. My appetite improved because I wasn’t feeling nauseous anymore.

Just before the wedding day, I was out in a restaurant and was in so much pain. I had took 12 drops of CBD oil beforehand but after two hours, when it came to cutting up my main meal; my right arm felt so heavy, bruised and I struggled to lift it. It says on the packaging to not exceed the dosage recommended but I was desperate. I would not recommend doing it. I put 10-12 drops in my pepsi and drunk it slowly. Within 10 minutes I regained function of my arm again and was actually able to use my knife and fork, I didn’t need to get help from my fiance in front of his friends!

It may seem like a little achievement but for me it is a big achievement. I find it embarrasing being like this and having to have people cut up my food for me, I feel like i’ve gone backwards to being like a 5 year old. I don’t recommend to go against the advice on the packaging, I just did because I made the choice to.

It makes me wonder, how much higher of a percentage would I need to get that kind of result without taking that many drops?

I lasted my whole wedding day!

The night before my wedding day, I could not sleep. The hotel bed was not that comfy so I had about 3 hours sleep. I was at the venue for 9:30am getting myself and everything else ready. I did not leave the venue until 11:45pm. Everyone was so surprised that I was still up and standing, so I was to be honest! I had taken CBD oil early hours in the morning, later on in the morning, and in the night.

I was able to walk around in a poofy dress and whilst I had some pain, I was not suffering terribly. I was able to cut up my own dinner and I was able to stand up for ages having my photo taken. I did not really suffer from the limb limpness as I topped up before the CBD wore off. It really did work wonders and I am so grateful that my mum got me it as if she hadn’t I probably would have been having to take the max dose of tramadol allowed which would have made me dizzy and nauseous.

My grandparents did not even know I was on CBD the whole day until I told them, they were surprised. A lot of people associate CBD oil as being like the real stuff; they expect you to be slightly high or to show some kind of sign that you have taken something.

It didn’t eliminate the pain, I don’t know if anything ever will but it made it a lot more tolerable than usual. For those that are chronically ill; just having a lower pain day than normal is a good day for us!



This blog post, and the companies guideline should not be taken as medical advise, always consult your doctor as everyone’s body is different. I certainly do not have any qualifications or knowledge in medicines etc, I am just writing this as a point of view from someone who is suffering and wants to give out a first hand experience for those who are curious of CBD oil.

Working with multiple illnesses

I have been diagnosed with CRPS, Fibromyalgia, M.E, depression & anxiety.

I had a very bad start to the year. I was out of work for 2 years and I started to feel increasingly useless and worthless, despite getting engaged in September last year.

The depression was at an all time high in January and I was having dark thoughts daily.

I was feeling extremely tired and in April got diagnosed with an underactive thyroid. It had been going up and down for about 2 years but it finally started to fail; so I was able to start levothyroxine.

Having tried and failed to get PIP for the third year running; I was feeling really stressed as I felt like I was useless not being able to contribute to helping my fiance pay for everything. Our essential outgoings including mortgage, gas, electricity, car insurance etc is about 1k a month. He took a pay cut this year to get into a more stable job (he was on a 0 hour contract). It has not been great for us financially but it is a much more promising future for him, he is actually somebody is this company and not just a number.


I felt like I was stuck in a rut and desperately needed to help out, so I applied for lots of jobs. I ended up getting one and they said that they would support me.

However after a while, cracks were starting to appear and I was not being treated, in my eyes, the way I should have been. There were many things being said and done that questioned why i’m there. I was lifting things like parcels every day; it may not be that heavy for a normal person but for me; sometimes just lifting one semi heavy parcel would trigger the CRPS in my right arm and make it limp for the next two days.

I worked saturdays and sundays. After doing my sunday shift; I would get home and barely be able to walk. I am very lucky that my fiance was able to pick me up most of the time in his car. I can remember one particular sunday I was so drained I could not even use my ipad or iphone, I could not physically lift my arm because it was so limp. I had to lay flat on the couch for an hour not doing anything as my body couldn’t take it.


I often couldn’t cut up my dinner on sunday evenings because I was so exhausted. My repetitive strain injury kept flaring as well which did not help.

I stopped taking the odd trip out in the week day; and just stayed indoors for 5 days just so that I could be better to go in for saturday and sunday. I was becoming miserable. I strained my neck at work lifting parcels and was put on tramadol. I am still on it as it was the only thing that helped me get through my shifts. It may be a wrong reason to be on it but it was my only way of coping.

My anxiety started flaring as I was struggling to do tasks. Each month that went by, I took longer and longer to recover after each shift and I was struggling to do tasks that I could do at the beginning. Some things that were said to me; and some of the ignorancy surrounding my illnesses and disabilities really upset me and got to me.

The treatment by some people was too much for me to take. Dealing with depression and the constant pain from these illnesses is hard enough to deal with let alone having to deal with family issues; family members being ill, and people at work making things difficult. I thought no I can’t take this anymore. I spoke with my fiance and despite me quitting right on top of our wedding and on top of christmas; we think its the right thing to do as my mental health has took a major step backwards.

He said to me that he has noticed I am always second guessing myself recently and that he has noticed my confidence has gone and that I have no faith in myself.

He has been very supportive of me. I am the one being hard on myself. I lasted 5 months in retail with these illnesses. I suppose that is an achievement. However I feel like all working has done is made me more ill and has damaged my mental health again.

I went to the doctor recently about my anxiety and the new pains and tenderness I am getting in my left side and leg. They confirmed the fibromyaglia is spreading onto that side now. They think me leaving my job is necessary for my anxiety and that if it does not calm down soon they may put me on a low dose of some beta blocker to help.

I am on the max dose of citalopram and take tramadol so I have to be careful what I take.

I need time to get better more so mentally before I start thinking of going for jobs again.. although I am very worried at what an earth I will be able to manage.

I think it is ridiculous that people like myself are classed as ‘fit to work’ when our GP’s say otherwise. I have forced myself into work because I cannot get any financial help and it’s just costing me my health.

I am praying that one day medicinal cannabis will be available to those with chronic pain conditions. Tramadol barely touches my pain and its a dangerous addictive drug to be on.


Apologies for rambling on, whoever has read this far; thank you for reading! I am a bit all over the place, I am having an anxiety attack just writing this.



CBD Paste Experience from CBD Brothers

I have been trialing a selection of products from CBD Brothers. I have not finished them all so for now this post will just be about the CBD paste.

I have been using the ‘Green Edition Whole Plant Extract – 14% ‘ High Concentration CBD paste. It is Sativa extract.

From doing research online, cannabis is divided into two groups; sativa and indica.

The CBD oil from CBD Brothers I have tried a couple of times is the white edition 500mg – 30% which is a cannabis indica whole plant extract.

My automatic thoughts were that the CBD oil would be better for my pains because the percent is 30%. However it has been the opposite for me!

I will write more about the CBD oil in another post; this one will focus on the paste.


This is the packaging for the Green Edition from the CBD Brothers website


It comes in a nice lightweight cardboard packaging, I like it as it goes well with what the product is, natural.

I have never seen a product in a syringe before so it was different to me, I made sure I hid it in my bag when I went out otherwise from first look someone might think I had a syringe needle. I like the syringe as it is easy to dispense the product and to control the amount that comes out. It has a screw cap over the opening so it keeps it nice and secure; you don’t have to worry about it spilling in your bag or accidentally dispensing any if you push on the syringe bit as it stops it from happening.


This picture shows the sample i received. I had already used a bit before taking a photo. As you can see, the paste looks black. The syringe is so easy to use that even with my constant chronic pain in my right wrist, I am able to use it with ease and no pain at all. The cap is easy to unscrew as well as it has grooves on it like a cog, so its not flat and hard to get a grip of.



The instructions are to get a rice grain size of the product and to rub it on your gums and give it two minutes to sink in; then swallow. This was easy to do but it left my finger stained green for a while even after washing with soap, it didn’t bother me though.


I thought it tasted absolutely vile. It has no additives to flavour it or anything; it is all natural and tastes quite plant like as expected.

It was nasty but it’s something you just have to deal with if you are seeking pain relief!

It smells very plant like as well; I find it a revolting smell but other people don’t find it as bad. My Nan and Grandad think it smells a bit like celery, where as my fiance finds it smells a bit like liquorice.

The taste goes after a while if you have a flavoured drink or having some minty flavoured chewing gum.


I have been diagnosed with CRPS, fibromyalgia and chronic fatigue syndrome.

CRPS (Complex regional pain syndrome) also known as the suicide disease; is the dominating condition for me. My whole nervous system on the right hand side of my body likes to send pain signals 24/7 to my right limbs. I developed CRPS as a result of having RSI (repetitive strain injury) in my right wrist which was not treated properly in good time; and as a result, developed into CRPS which is a life long, incurable condition.


Every time I have tried it, it was when my right leg was feeling very heavy and limp. On occasions my right arm has also felt heavy and had shooting pains down it; with my wrist feeling stabbing shooting pains also.

Within 10 minutes of in-taking the paste; my leg goes lightweight and it pretty much feels the same as my left leg. The pain in the wrist would decrease and make the pain a lot more tolerable. Sometimes it even eliminated the wrist pain and it made my wrist feel normal for once.

People have asked me if I get high and my answer is ‘no’.

It does not have the same compounds as pure cannabis, they are taken out so you don’t get ‘high’. I have no effects after taking; no dizziness, no feeling high, no slurring my words.

I even trialed it by going to the gym!

I have been told that I am not fit for work and not fit for the gym as my recovery time is not that of a normal persons. Having chronic fatigue syndrome, low vitamin D levels, Complex regional pain syndrome and fibromyalgia does not help with recovery time as all of the symptoms give me fatigue. I do not have a job, I do not get any kind of benefits; so doing a little bit at the gym was an easy choice for me to make because I always have time to recover, if that makes sense, as I never have any event that I have to quickly get better for.

Within two minutes on the treadmill, my right leg started to get heavy and it triggered the nerves in the whole of the right hand side. I took some paste and within 5 minutes everything settled down and I was able to continue doing a walk. If I didn’t take the paste, my leg would have ended up going limp and I wouldn’t have even been able to do 10 minutes before sitting on the floor in pain and defeat.

I have only been to the gym twice. As my fiance is signed up to one; he has given me a code which allows a friend to visit four times in a month.

I will never be able to go to the gym in this current state without taking CBD. It somehow masks my nerves and tricks my brain into thinking everything is all good again.

It does not 100% get rid of my pain but it does mask the limpness of my arm and leg for me for a few hours; and i find it does ease my pain by at least 50%. It is more relief than what I ever got when I was on gabapentin, tramadol, etc.


Unfortunately my recent PIP application (third year in a row) was denied so I am not able to afford to buy any CBD paste at this moment in time. It is £14.75 for 5ml. It is definately something I will look at buying if I win my PIP appeal and/or if i get a 2 day a week job (which i will definately need CBD to be able to do).

They are not advertised as medicinal

CBD brothers do not advertise their products as medicinal. I am not in the healthcare profession so I cannot give any advice; just relay my experience for my own body.

Everyone’s body is different so someone else may use the exact same product and it may not work for them; and someone else might find that it totally eliminates their pain.

It is advised that you speak to a doctor before taking CBD supplements especially if you are on medication. I did not seek advice by my own choice, but I do recommend speaking to someone especially if you are concerned about certain tablets and effects.

If you are after trialing before buying, CBD Brothers do sample requests, where you can select a maximum of 2 samples and just pay for the postage. The link below takes you to the page on their website which goes into more detail:

Sample requests

A  little bit about CBD Brothers

They are very easy to talk to and seem to care for their customers, putting them first before money. You can speak to them in various ways such as calling them up, emailing them or messaging through twitter. I like that they make their products in the UK and make sure to use only high quality ingredients. They are very quick at shipping and the products arrive in good condition.

They sell other CBD products such as oils and balms. Their laboratory is based in Suffolk, England; with their products being grown using an organic process. The cannabis and hemp extracts are imported from Europe.

I found them through twitter which is a social media they use actively. Their twitter username is @cbdbrothers 

You can look at their website and what products they sell from the link below:



What is CBD Oil?

CBD oil occurs naturally in industrial hemp/cannabis. It is a non-psychoactive cannaboid, which means you will not get the same side effects as pure cannabis in terms of getting high. CBD oil is legal in the UK, but it is not available on the NHS so can be expensive to get a hold of.

What are the supposed health benefits?

It is said to help reduce pain, anxiety, depression, and act as a sleep aid. I believe that each body is different so it may work for some, and not for some others.

What conditions do I suffer from?

I suffer from Complex Regional Pain Syndrome. It affects my vascular and nervous system. I am in pain from head to toe on my right hand side but it is nerve pain; so painkillers like ibuprofen, tramadol and naproxen do not touch the pain.

I also suffer from fibromyalgia. It works with my CRPS to make my right hand side hurt 24/7 and my limbs to feel brusied.

I also suffer with depression and anxiety.

What medications have I tried?

For depression: Fluoxetine, Amitriptyline, Citalopram

For pain: Ibuprofen, Paracetemol, Naproxen, Tramadol, Co-codomol, Codeine, Amitriptyline, Gabapentin, Ibuprofen gel, movelat gel

Most came with side effects that were terrible.

What CBD oil have I tried?

In November 2017 I tried ‘Love Hemp™ 800mg 8% CBD Oil – 10ml’ – Flavour: Peppermint from



Packaging & design

It arrived in a little bottle with a pipette. It is very easy to use but needs to be tightened up properly after use otherwise it can leak out. The bottle comes in a little cardboard container which is very helpful since I did have my bottle leak a bit. It prevented it from going into my bag. The packaging was nice and it was easy to read. It is useful to keep the packaging as it has the intake instructions and dosage on there where the little bottle doesn’t.

Smell & Taste

There was an option to pick natural flavour or peppermint. I decided to pick peppermint as I have tried a few herbal things before and they tasted vile. The Peppermint smell was quite nice but it definately did not taste like it.


It is recommended to be used 2-3 times per day from 6 – 12 drops. The drops are to be placed under the tongue and held in the mouth for a minute before swallowing. My first few days I used 6 drops and it did ease up some pain within half hour. It also made me feel calm.

As it was expensive I used it sparingly. On days I did not need to go out, I did not use it despite being in pain. Over the christmas period I worked a 2 day contract in retail; doing 12 hours over the 2 days. On them days I had to take 12 drops three times a day just to get through the shifts. Within 10 minutes of taking it the nerve pain had calmed down. I had limpness in my leg but that was eased up a lot and I was able to ignore it. However when the CBD started wearing off after around 4 hours; I could really feel the weakness and the pain coming on heavy.

The CBD oil ran out quickly so I havn’t bought again yet as I cannot afford to be using it every day. In my personal opinion, I think it worked rather well for my body and my conditions. It is much safer than taking Tramadol, which is a dangerous and addictive drug. I was on that for 1 and half months; and it only touched the pain on the first few days of taking it. The CBD oil has been the most effective thing so far at helping with my chronic pain.

I wasn’t sure at first whether to buy it but I was so in need of a pain relief I took a chance and bought it.


At the moment, this bottle is on sale for £54.99 not including a small postage fee.

I think I got it for just under £50 in November as I used a code they gave out for black friday. They do 20% off codes here and there; the most recent was a 20% valentines day offer.

There are other options available. There are bottles with higher mg and percentage but they are pricey, some bottles are £299.99 for 10ml. That stuff will be much stronger but it isn’t feasible for those of us who are ill and barely have/do not have an income.

The CBD oil is also available as vape liquid, gummy bears, balm, cream and capsules.

I am currently trying Holland & Barrett’s CBD oil which is currently on offer for £9.49 instead of £19.99 for 10ml. It is not as strong as the one I bought previously but I am willing to try it as I cannot afford to do about £50 a month on CBD oil. I will be writing up a review on the Holland & Barrett one once I have used it more and can give an honest opinion.

Working whilst chronically ill

I have complex regional pain syndrome, fibromyalgia, chronic fatigue syndrome, vitamin D deficiency and depression.


I have been told I am not well enough to work at this moment in time what with everything my body is going through. However I am not allowed PIP as I am not disabled enough. I can’t get ESA; I am on job seekers allowance at the moment because I am broke. I am being made to get a job to show the government I am trying.

I have to apply for jobs or else I will get sanctioned and in the end be taken off JSA.

I applied for temp work at a well known high street store and had a phone call the very next day. I ticked the ‘do you consider yourself to have a disability box’. Normally when I tick that I do not hear anything back.

The lady on the phone explained to me that they need sales assistants for christmas eve and boxing day. I told her about my disabilities and she was not put off at all. She went through what sort of work there would be and said that she will make sure I do not lift heavy things or have to go up ladders. The hours were going to be 8 hours but she reduced it to 6 hours for me and told me to speak up if I am struggling.

I was very pleased that they were not put off and were so accommodating for me.


Christmas Eve 11am-5pm

I turned up at the shop quite nervous and self concious. I have never done retail work before so I had no idea what to expect. I got given a locker and key to put my bag in, and was taken to a section that had been closed off to the public in preparation for boxing day. There were lots of us working in the mens section. My first job was to get all the fragrances and put them onto stands near the till. It wasn’t too difficult; only carried like two at a time. There was no rush and I wasn’t pressured to hurry up.

After the shelves were done; I then had to sort of childrens clothes and put them onto rails. Again I only carried what I could handle. Others were carrying more but I did not feel pressured to hurry up or compete or anything.

I wasn’t asked to push any rails out onto the shop floor. I had the task, with a few others, to use a little tag gun to put the new tag prices onto clothes. This took quite a while and was actually quite draining. I have problems with the right hand side of my body; so after a while my leg really started to feel heavy and in pain as there was nowhere to sit down. I also had to squat to get to the lower rail of the clothes rail to tag some of the kids clothes. It was putting a lot of strain on my right leg.

We got a half hour lunch so  I went and got a mcdonalds.

The manager that I had spoke to on the phone came round and checked up on everything in the afternoon. She asked me how I was doing; to which I replied I am struggling and in a lot of pain but I am pushing through it. She asked me if I needed to go home and I said no I don’t want to give up. She asked me if I needed a break; and I said no but she then told me to go take one, so I did. That is a good manager there.

I felt a bit better after sitting down for about 20 minutes and just clearing my head.

I went back to the shop floor and got back to tagging. There were a lot of children’s clothes to tag!

I finished at 5 and was so relieved that I had managed to get through the day. My fiance picked me up nearby so I didn’t have to walk home as it was dark and he knew I was in a lot of pain.

I had a few tears; not just from pain but from being so glad I managed to hold out.

I got home and flopped out on the couch. I didn’t do anything for the rest of the evening; I was in too much pain. I am lucky my fiance makes me dinner as I wouldn’t have been able to do it. I was too tired and pained to shower or tidy the house.

I was in pain Christmas day; I definitely felt the right side was very unhappy. However I managed the day and saw people. I went to bed early as I had to be back at work at 8am boxing day.


Boxing day 8am-3pm

As soon as I walked in on boxing day; there were people buying things and everyone was so busy. I was told to stay around the ladies wear sale section. I didn’t have any experience in dealing with customers face to face so it was all new to me.

I picked up clothes from the floor as soon as I saw them get knocked off.

I picked up rubbish and tags off the floor to keep it clean.

I heard someone say that they thought the shop was so civilized and clean.

I rearranged some shelf displays as some things were at the very bottom shelf and were being missed. I had to walk around the same areas a lot to make sure things were tidy.

I helped customers who were struggling; to put their items into a bag. I even fetched them bags when I saw they were struggling to carry what they had.

I answered their questions to the best of my ability and went to ask another employee when I didn’t know.

I went to lunch at around 11:30 and had another mcdonalds. When I got back, I was asked to work in the childrens wear. It was chaos up there; so many people and buggies. Lots of things were being left on the floor and the shoe section.. a nightmare. I helped a lady find the last pair of these certain shoes that were in her size, and even helped a lady pick out what trousers to get her baby. At around half 1 I could really feel the pain kicking in. I actually sat on the floor when I was sorting out the shoe section again as I just needed to rest my leg. When it got to 3 I was so happy my shift was over as I was in agony. My right arm had started to hurt and I was sweating like mad.

My fiance met me and we went to the car. I was barely able to walk; the pain was intense! I got home and flopped on the couch crying from pain.


Today is the 30th and I have been stuck indoors since boxing day afternoon. I still have not recovered quite yet. Every day my right leg has really been throbbing and feeling heavy. My right wrist has been playing up too.

The work was not even that intense; my left side is completely fine. To take so long to recover as well is not a good sign; I agree with my neurologist; I am not fit to be working at this moment in time.

Right now as I write this; my wrist is hurting and my leg is so bruised I can’t even put pressure on it because it is agonizing.

For both shifts; I took tablets that are supposed to keep me awake; both at the start of the shift and at lunch time. I also used CBD oil before and during the shifts. I used the maximum dosage as I was in that much pain. It didn’t get rid of the pain; just helped ease it. I have actually ran out of it now.

To have to rely on medicines to help get me through shifts is not good enough; I need to be healthy enough so that I do not need to use them.

Overall; I did enjoy my experience as it was nice to get out and earn a little bit of money. I enjoyed working on the shop floor; I felt like I had a purpose. However I did not enjoy it when my pain levels got really high. Working in an office environment like my previous job might be over but I am considering retail, when  I am better that is! I really liked working for this company and would be happy to go back to them.

I feel a bit frustrated that I have had to go this far to prove that I am not well to work.

However I am happy to have tried because I know for sure that I am not exaggerating when I tell people that I am not well and that I take a long time to recover.




My Personal Symptoms

I currently suffer with a few chronic illnesses.

Complex Regional Pain Syndrome – (CRPS), also known as reflex sympathetic dystrophy (RSD), is a long term pain syndrom. The pain is usually confined to one limb, but it can sometimes spread to other parts of the body. The skin of the affected body part can become so sensitive that just a slight touch, bump or even a change in temperature can provoke intense pain. Affected areas can also become swollen, stiff or undergo fluctuating changes in colour or temperature.

Fibromyalgia – also called fibromyalgia syndrome (FMS), is a long-term condition that causes pain all over the body. The exact cause of fibromyalgia is unknown, but it’s thought to be related to abnormal levels of certain chemicals in the brain and changes in the way the central nervous system (brain, spinal cord and nerves) processes pain messages carried around the body.

Chronic Fatigue Syndrome – (CFS/ME) is a long-term illness with a wide range of symptoms. The most common symptom is extreme tiredness.

Depression – Suffering from Depression is more than just being ‘unhappy’. It is something that does not just go away and has many symptoms. They range from lasting feelings of unhappiness and hopelessness, to losing interest in the things you used to enjoy and feeling very tearful.  Many people also suffer with anxiety.

Vitamin D deficiency – means that you are not getting enough vitamin D to stay healthy.


  • Exhausted all the time
  • Sharp shooting pains
  • Head pain which has been going on every day for over 200 days straight
  • Cold right hand and arm
  • Bruised feeling on whole right side of body; a light prod can really hurt
  • Feeling hopeless and feeling like a failure
  • Suicidal thoughts
  • Mood swings
  • Constant worrying about the future
  • Lack of motivation
  • Feeling guilty
  • Disturbed sleep
  • Avoiding socialising
  • Forgetting things a lot
  • Painful muscles
  • Numbness in little finger from time to time
  • Heavy aching limbs followed by limpness of the limbs
  • Itchy red hot skin on hands from time to time
  • Dry skin
  • Very greasy hair and face
  • Trouble concentrating
  • Restless right leg from time to time
  • Low blood pressure
  • Takes ages to recover from cuts etc.

Since 2015, my thyroid keeps going from normal to under active to normal again every 6 months. I am being tested regularly for it. It runs in my mums side of the family and doctors expect for it to fail one day.